Sermons from Bible Baptist Church of Puyallup: STRAIGHT UP HAPPY

Proverbs 31:10-28 (KJV)

Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.

She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

I want to take you back to the first message I brought this year. The passage was, Genesis 30:13 (KJV)

And Leah said, Happy am I, for the daughters will call me blessed: and she called his name Asher.

Genesis 30:13 is the first time we find the word “blessed” in the Bible and, we find the Hebrew word translated “blessed” not once but three times in this one verse.

It’s important because we find that Hebrew word in three of the four variations it is found in the Bible:

• Happy - H837 - her state of emotion
• Blessed - H833 –the root word- her state of reputation
• Asher - H836 - her state of testimony

The Hebrew with is Asher

It is a name of one of the 12 tribes of Israel and it is translated

• Blessed or
• Happy

But the root definition of the word mans, “to be straight, level or right.”

It is this root word that we find in, Proverbs 31:28 (KJV)

Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

It is for that reason that I have given this message the title, Straight Up Happy.

Happiness is the product of doing the right thing. It is the fruit of entering the strait gate and walking in the way of righteousness.

Usually when we think of Proverbs 31, we think of the woman.

Proverbs 31:10 (KJV)

Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

Would you notice with me that, while this virtuous woman is the star of the chapter, she is not the only player.

Proverbs 31 is not just about the wife – in just verse 28 we find three different characters:

• The children
• The wife and
• The Husband

While I think an argument can be made from Proverbs 31, “If Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.”

If a family wants to be truly happy, Momma isn’t the only one who needs to be walking in the way of righteousness.

I want to show you what I see in this chapter about all three characters beginning first with,

I. THE HUSBAND

He is found three times in the passage

Notice

A. His heart for her

Proverbs 31:11 (KJV)

The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

The spirit of the Lord immediately transports me from here to Ephesians 5:25 (KJV)

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

Straight up – just telling you like it is men, If you want happiness in your house, love your wife like Christ loved the church.

Give yourself for her.

• No excuses
• No getting around it
• None of this “I will if she will” stuff.

• Give your heart to your wife.
• Give it away – wholly to her.

• No one else
• No thing else

• Give away your hobbies
• Give away your personal goals
• Give away old friends

It sounds like a lot to ask, but it isn’t as much as Christ gave for the church is it?

I don’t want you to hold me to this, not because it might not be true, but because of you do you won’t really give your heart to your wife, but I am certain that if you give away all of that for her, she will give it all back – and better.

Proverbs 31:12 (KJV)

She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

Notice secondly

B. His leadership and authority

Proverbs 31:23 (KJV)

Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

I want to put this in the context of 1 Corinthians 11:3 (KJV)

But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

The husband is to be the head of the home.

1 Peter 3:1 (KJV) says

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

The husband ought to lead the home.

But notice that in the context of Proverbs 31 we find his leadership, outside of the home

• He is sitting at the gates among the elders
• He is leading the city

And I can tell you this – he had to earn that role.

• He could not have demanded it
• He didn’t just walk up one day and take it

He had to earn it.

Husbands, God has given you the role of head of the home.

But you ought to see it as your duty to spend the rest of your life earning the right to do it.

And then notice

C. His praise for her

Proverbs 31:28 (KJV)

…. her husband also, and he praiseth her.

1 Peter 3:7 (KJV)

Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

Ephesians 5:28-29 (KJV)

So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

The husband’s role is to make his wife feel like a queen to him.

• He honors her
• He cherishes her
• He lifts her up and blesses her

Someone is going to argue that he does all of that because she is a virtuous wife. “If my wife were virtuous” they might say, “I would do that for her.”

That argument is based on a naturalist view of the world. It forgets God.

Because of the supernatural element (God) if any one person in the family dynamic walks in the way of righteousness, the reasonable expectation is that others in the family will eventually do that same.

Now let’s see the role of

II. THE WIFE

I am of the opinion that we have misunderstood the Proverbs 31 woman in our generation. I have some ideas about why we do that – ideas that I do not want to get into right now.

Let’s just see what this passage says about her

A. She is good

Proverbs 31:12 (KJV)

She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

That’s a pretty nice thing.

I always appreciate it when my wife helps me do what I believe God is leading me in rather than trying to stop me.

Ladies, the first role God gave you in marriage is to be your husband’s helpmeet.

• He is not supposed to run over you but
• You are not supposed to henpeck him

He was created to subdue and conquer

You were created to help him do it

It can be a thankless job, I know it.

Martha Washington stayed home and managed Mt Vernon while Washington was away getting fame for himself.

When he left the summer 1775 he told his wife he would be home by Christmas. He just didn’t tell her which one.

The only time she got to see him during the next eight years was when she came to visit him at Valley Forge – wouldn’t that have been nice!

My wife, and my kids too, by the way, have had to follow me wherever I believed God led me – and with only a little exception, they had no opportunity to tell me whether they believed God was leading them the same direction.

Anita married an Ironworker who, at the age of 22 was the highest paid person in our church at the time.

A year later we didn’t have money to buy food.

• We lived in a 33 ft trailer in someone’s pasture for free if I would change sprinklers
• Anita had to wash our clothes in the trailer bathtub
• We ate food people from a church we didn’t go to gave us
• We couldn’t afford gas to go to church unless someone else gave it to us and
• The only job I could find had the two of us scrubbing down the walls of a cattle auction yard
• Anita was pregnant and lost our first baby during those days

It was in the middle of all of that I announced God was leading me to move 1200 miles away to start Bible College.

Anita took the only money we had left, an annuity she had saved up as a public school teacher, to pay for our trip.

I have mover her (and our kids too)

• From Oregon
• To Colorado
• To Oregon
• To California
• To Washington
• To Oklahoma
• To Washington

I know Anita’s heart. She would have stayed in one place, made a home there and lived out ours lives right there.

But when I confided in her that I believed God was leading me in a another direction, she packed up our stuff, encouraged our children and helped me.

She did me good, and not evil.

B. She is industrious

Proverbs 31:13-21 (KJV)